Spicy Up Your Life

Have you heard of the expression 'biting off more than you can chew'?

It often happens in the workplace. We hear stories of eager beavers who continually take on more workload in order to assert themselves as valuable assets to the company. You know, the Ugly Bettys of the working world. They sometimes bite off more than they can chew.

I did a similar thing at work. I bit into my lunch - a seemingly normal submarine sandwich dropped off to me by my mother (it was so thoughtful of her). As I worked my way to the middle of the sandwich I took an overzealous chomp and felt the luau commence in my mouth. Like a small fire pit party with people dancing around it. The creep of dread travelled up the back of my skull like a warning sign of bad things to come and there was a solitary thought in my mind, "Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!". The luau evolved into a volcanic eruption threatening to singe my taste buds and the party people were now running for their lives.

It was so ironic that she had also dropped off a 1L bottle of water with my lunch. Was she forshadowing what was to come? I was gulping down water but it was futile. The fire would not be subdued. I'm such a wimp when it comes to spicy food. For my mother to drop off that sandwich laden with all sorts of lethal peppers...it led me to believe she was trying to kill me.

I felt hysterical so I dashed to the washroom and did the only logical thing - I started drooling.

With nothing to do until the fiery sensation subsided I focused on my reflection and observed the tears pooling in my eyes, the drool running from my tongue, and the drip forming from my nose. It was a miserable moment in Monica history; ridiculous and hilarious all at once. It's kind of perverse how people willingly consume spicy things to shock their senses. How can you taste anything with all of the hurt? I heard it's an acquired taste.

The only things I acquired were a massive headache and an aversion to my mother's taste in food. Should I ever feel the urge to spice things up in the future, I'll pop in my Spice Girls CD.